You are receiving this either because you subscribed or someone you know sent it to you. If you no longer wish to be on this list, or wish to change your email address, use the link at the bottom of the page.

Please feel free to distribute this to anyone.

Become a subscriber.

Read this issue on my website.

I invite you to send me any suggestions for topics that you'd like me to cover. I also welcome any comments you have about this ezine.  

Haber Resources, Inc. respects the privacy of all subscribers and will not disclose your email address or any information about you to any third parties.

Published by Muriel Haber, Secrets For Successful Change: Your Silent Partner, is devoted to learning to live effectively and productively in today's fast paced, ever changing, double boiler, pressure cooker world. Its purpose is to help you through the changes you must face.

"The way things are is not the way thing have to be." -- Muriel Haber

1. Welcome
2. Article: Like It Or Not - You Can Turn Your Life Into a Great Adventure!
Why Not Like It Too?
3. What's New?
4. TIPS FOR STRESS-FREE LIVING
5. A Thought, A Quote, or Something Lighter
6. Contact Information

Hello <$firstname$>!

Welcome to the February issue of my e-mail newsletter SECRETS FOR SUCCESSFUL CHANGE: YOUR SILENT PARTNER.

Today is a lucky day for me. Friday the 13th. If you don't consider the number 13 to be "lucky" - you probably won't receive this before the 14th anyway. It is also a lucky time for New York City. We have had more than a week of above freezing temperature after a month of the coldest weather we've had in 100 years.

Now, if some of you aren't happy with February 14th because it is Valentines Day, there are several new meanings to that day as well. No longer is it taken for granted that a single person will feel alone or deprived on that day. Demographics show that the number of unmarried adults grew by 12% to 82 million during the 1990's.

And hotels are finding a booming business this year. It isn't just from couples. Singles choosing to pamper themselves, families looking for a Valentine Experience and a surprising number of singles with pets!

Hotels are now offering special programs for the single with pet this weekend. The Lowes chain has a special package called "Puppy Love" for the single with a pet.

Each month, you will receive another issue. The initial purpose of this ezine is to help implement some of the ideas and goals expressed on my website. It will usually consist of a message from me, an article by me and sometimes an article by another author. I will be offering ways to help you deal more easily with life's unexpected, unwanted and often unacceptable changes. I hope that by reading my publication you will find support and perhaps a feeling of camaraderie.

Any methods I've used when I've had to deal with seemingly intolerable situations will be available for your consideration. What will work for you may be very different from what worked for me or for anyone else. But I'll share with you what I have learned. One of my goals will be to guide you beyond the obvious. If you like, I will be the 'Silent Partner' that many of you are lacking.

I invite you to e-mail me at Muriel@HaberResources.com with any suggestions, questions, and topics you would like me to cover. I am also interested in any comments you have about this publication.

Warmly,

Muriel

If the title of this month's article has aroused visions of rafting down a racing river, rubber scraping over jagged rocks, life vests soaked with the slapping thrusts of cold, gushing white water, you're on the right track. When your pulse quickens as your imagination brings you images of once in a lifetime feats full of thrills and danger - your instincts tell you that this will be an experie nce of intense excitement, challenge; and the confidence that you will prevail as you go, on into the future.

So you ride those rapids. Why? Because they are there. And you scale the cold gray sides of a bare rocky slab of mountain, reminding yourself to look up - not down - go forward - not back where you started - but ahead - keeping your focus on the goal which is in front of you.

And on the way forward, when swirling, speeding rapids appear from nowhere, what is there to do?

Well, as a coach, I will tell you - go forth - onward - upward. Over here, under there - around each obstacle, through the fog and out the other side.

How often have you found yourself telling someone about an incident that seemed an unwelcome and inconvenient intrusion? But you talk about it later because the mistake, the intrusion, wound up being the instrument that lead you to an unexpected place. An adventure.

Can you recall your initial reaction to the unexpected occurrence? Depending on the specific circumstances, it may have ranged from anger and dismay to screaming, crying or ranting. But that is just your first response. Other things can happen.

As some of you know, I've spent a good deal of time traveling - often to foreign countries. This is a love that began as a child. My family often took us on long distance car trips. We lived in New York City, and from there we went in many directions. We went south, to Florida, then north to Canada where Quebec and it's ancient fort were indelibly impressed upon my eight year old mind. Eventually we headed west, traveling across the USA, stopping at both urban and very rural places - experiencing the wonders of the land, the natural resources of our country, noticing the diversity among people in their dress, speech and attitudes -- a circus in one town, a rodeo in the next.

During these trips, I began to realize that when one parent or the other became as cranky as we kids and started complaining, the rest of us were uncomfortable. What began to take shape for me was that each phase, every person, and all of the varied incidents had something to offer us all.

Getting lost meant seeing something that we hadn't planned on seeing - but frequently turned out to be the experience we wouldn't have known to plan on. We were exposed to sights and people in a way no guide book or travel agent could have planned for us. By accepting the things we hadn't planned, we could appreciate things for what they were. When we gave ourselves permission to really look at the unexpected, not just stew about it, we were able to really see what was there - and were grateful for the gift.

I learned, not by discussion, but by experiencing open mindedly, that when we didn't get exactly what our parents told us was coming, we were getting something else instead. Better still, we may not have found the place we were looking for, but we did find a surprise, the likes of which no one could have told us to expect.

The ability that I acquired, that formed in me, in a very natural way, turned out to be one of the most important parts of my personality. Perhaps I just wanted so much to find the fun, the excitement, the wonder in life so much that I couldn't allow not finding what our plans promised the power to spoil the wonder of what we found instead. I discovered the love of the anticipation of finding what was just around the next bend.

When I began to travel alone, I consciously chose, before each journey, to be prepared for changes; lost luggage, missed planes, less than ideal sleeping quarters - and as many other possible surprises as once again, life and I conjured up.

Remember these accidental pleasures. I remind myself, as well as my friends and clients, that despite our good planning, one must accept the unexpected, not as a loss or serious disappointment, but as part of the whole.

Thus, when something unplanned rears up to block our way, or change our direction, figure out quickly how best to incorporate it into your trip, evening, life. Nothing can be gained by complaining about what is inevitable.

Step forward and embrace what has appeared to greet you. No one will admire your courage more than you will. Your pride in your own bravery will be quite a reward.

If you do accept the unexpected - you can go with the current, ride the wave, stir your imagination and maybe have a surprisingly different but grand and memorable time.

 
The final thought: "Happiness - Choose what you've got, not what you didn't get."

Although I won't always have this category, it's here because this is where you will find announcements of teleclasses. Some free, others not. There will also be announcements of other things such as a new Free Item on my website, a great new or newly discovered book or article by another author.

Here is where I just might list a new thought that I'd love you to know about - to ponder, consider, relate to.

In January's newsletter I told you about the new topic called 'Stress-Free Living' on my web site, http://www.HaberResources.com/stressfreeliving.html. Here is where I will be writing about what stress does to us, why it happens, and tips on how to reduce or, better yet, eliminate it. Stress is so often the cause of our problems, as well as the result of them, that it really can't be ignored.

Today I am happy to announce that as a result of some emails from a few of you,not only will I will be addressing the topic of Meditation as a means to stress reduction,but I have made an introductory tape of meditation available.

SEND FOR YOUR FREE TAPE!

Since I believe in the damage caused by stress, and that meditation is a definite stress reducer, I am in the process of recording a short tape which will be particularly helpful for those of you who have not meditated before as well as those of you who would like to try again. It should be ready to send within a week so those of you who would like to receive the tape, please send me an email at Muriel@Haberresources.com and I will send the tape to you.

YES, IT IS FREE.

Last month's Stress Tip was short and simple. It was
PLAN EVERYTHING!
STRUCTURE BRINGS FREEDOM

You are able to find it in January's issue on my website by clicking on Ezine Archive at http://www.HaberResources.com/archiveindex.html

Today I am going to write about Meditation. If you had told me 4 or 5 years ago that I would be promoting meditation, let alone doing it, I probably would have said something like "Yeah, Right!"

But here I am, more than a true believer. A believer and a doer. And I hope that those of you out there reading this who don't know too much about meditation, or who just don't think it pays to be bothered, will pay attention.

MEDITATION, THE GREAT STRESS FIGHTER, GAINS DEVOTEES FROM ALL WALKS OF LIFE.BECAUSE IT WORKS.

The ancient practice of meditation is being lauded as a primary stress fighter and booster of the immune system.

Ten million Americans now say they practice some form of meditation regularly. People know their lives are more stressful than before. They are practicing meditation on their own or taking classes offered in a wide variety of settings.

Physicians especially recommend meditation for stress- related conditions where research has proved it to be very effective. And many physicians now use it as a way to control the pain of chronic diseases like heart conditions, AIDS, and cancer. It's also being used to help those suffering from depression and psychiatric disturbances.

According to Daniel Goleman, author of "Destructive Emotions" tests show that meditation can actually reset the brain, changing the point at which a problem sets the blood boiling.

Meditating in silence for 10 minutes or more a day while concentrating on breathing or a word can train you to focus on the present rather than the past or the future.

Here's a very general description of how to do it. If you send for my Free Tape, it will be much clearer.

• Find a quiet place. Tune out distractions. Turn out the lights if that helps. Turn off the telephone or disconnect it.
• Close your eyes. Shut out the world so your brain can stop processing information from the senses.
• Turn your attention to your breathing. Take three deep breaths blowing all the air out each time. Notice your breathing normally.
  Or, Pick a word, any word whose sound or rhythm is soothing when repeated.
• Say the word again and again to yourself with every out breath. This will help you focus.

Still feeling stressed? Check out my new Stress-Free Living section at my website at http://www.HaberResources.com/stressfreeliving.html and send for my free Meditation Tape for Beginners at  Muriel@Haberresources.com

February is Healthy Heart month. That is so appropriate! Aside from all of the sedentary lives people have been leading, when did you last get a really good check-up?

And why not hint that it's not chocolate that you want this year - but DARK CHOCOLATE! It's healthy(ier)

And for the first time that I noticed, people wore red  on February 6th, National Wear Red for Women Day, to remind others and themselves that heart disease is actually the biggest killer of women. That's something most people, including women, never knew.

And most importantly, finally doctors have published that women do not have the same warning symptoms when having heart attacks that men have. How many of you know what they are?

So for all of you who complain about broken hearts in February, don't let yours be one of them.

Take care of you!

"Nothing in life is so hard that you can't make it easier
by the way you take it." Ellen Glasgow (1874-1945)
Richmond,Va. poet,author who rejected the
Victorian definition of femininity that dominated
the social attitudes of her day.

"Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf"
American Indian Proverb

"Let there be spaces in your togetherness"
Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931)
Lebanese American author, poet, artist, philisopher

Today's quotes are borrowed by me from another coach named Mary Alice Orito. While she works on her upcoming website, she  puts out terrific quotes DAILY! I don't know where she finds them, but I like them. If you do, you can subscribe by
sending her an email MAO5oo@aol.com and write subscribe in the subject line

And I do like this one of mine........

"Happiness - Choose what you've got, not what you didn't get." -- Muriel Haber

This ezine is published by Muriel Haber, a life coach who helps people reinvent themselves during dramatic life change.

To send me email, Muriel@HaberResources.com.

To learn more about my coaching and program offerings, go to http://www.HaberResources.com.

You are free to use the material from my articles in whole or in part on your web site or ezine (email newsletter) as long as you include the attribution below and also let me know where the article will appear.

"This article is by Muriel Haber of Haber Resources, Inc. Muriel's web site is devoted to helping people reinvent themselves during dramatic life change. To learn more about Muriel's services and to get free resources on this subject visit http://www.HaberResources.com."

Copyright 2004 Haber Resources, Inc. All rights reserved.